Since moving to Ballarat 3 years ago I have been attending a Church which is pretty similar to the one we left in Swan Hill. We have never really settled in and become as involved as we once were in our old Church and over the past few months I have been to another Church of the same denominationon the other side of town because Sarah has some friends attending there.
Today we had some good friends down from Swan Hill to speak at the Church I havent been to for a couple of months so I went along to hear them. It was so weird being with people who knew me as the "involved in everything" Church member, amongst people who even after 3 years, hardly knew me at all.
I got to thinking about Church and belonging to a group of like minded believers. I also thought about what I believe about the Church and its place in the world. I realised that I have not really felt comfortable amonst like minded people for a long time. I have also not felt "known" by a group of Christians for a very long time.
I think that I have been guilty of blaming the fellowships I attend for not taking an interest in me and failing to find out who I am. I am starting to think that maybe I am looking for the right thing in the wrong places.
I am now starting to consider what is important to me in a fellowship, including worship, ministry and outreach. I know that fitting neatly within any fellowship for most people can be difficult, and I have always felt it was wrong to Church shop. But as I have very little social contact in Ballarat outside of my family and work, I think I need to be in a Church where I can at least have the opportunity to develop some meaningful friendships.
Not real sure how to find what I'm looking for.... Me and Bono both!
2 comments:
I've struggled with a lot of the same things, and have never found what I need inside a church. The cliques are not something I can deal with -- I want my relationships to be on a personal level, not on a business level, and without the drama that comes with a "circle of friends." I don't know how it's happened, but I have never belonged inside of a "group." Very few of my friends know each other, and when I do see them, I see them individually. I feel like I've been able to make a difference in many of their lives in this way, even though it is a lonely road sometimes. I think the only place I really belong is under the wings of our Father.
Can your family, the people you live with, love and take care of be your church? I live in a church but do not attend a traditional church service (and havent except for maybe 3 times in the last 11 months) but i can tell you that i have great fellowship with everyone corner i turn.
I think i might understand where you are at...i'm there to.
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